Ashley and mike biggest loser dating
He needs to feel like he is “conquering,” like he is significant, like he is having an impact on the world, like his is pursuing his mission in life.
Women are typically more driven by the desire to connect and build interpersonal relationships.
He got a real job, he committed to her, he took her on romantic dates, he was happy and alive. The short version of this very long conversation is that while he did love and care for me, being with me made him feel like an even bigger loser.
I felt devastated and I beat myself up over it for months. The more I tried to “fix” him, the more damaged he felt. The more I tried to make his life easier, the more comfortable he became with his own misery.
It’s not that he doesn’t love his partner, she just can no longer connect to him in the way he wants most and when that sort of pure appreciation comes from another source he can’t help but be drawn to it. During the workday, he is on fire with passion and thrives off of meeting the daily challenges of his job.
After killing it all day, he comes home feeling on top of the world and wants to share that energy with his girl. He feels like she doesn’t accept the most important part of his life, the thing that makes him feel effective and worthwhile.
I thought if I loved him enough then he would snap out of his funk and be the man I knew he could be. I didn’t encourage him to get his act together and instead, tried to take care of everything for him.
If these feelings converge with him meeting a woman who is turned on by him, who does value him, who does appreciate him, who makes him feel like a man well….
MORE: 5 Things Every Woman Needs to Know About Men I’m not saying cheating in this case is okay or acceptable. When my ex cheated on me I was devastated and thought he was the world’s biggest scumbag.
Men usually are tempted to cheat when they no longer feel like winners in their relationship. I’m not talking about narcissists or sociopaths or guys with major commitment issues.
A man’s most fundamental drive in this world is to feel like a winner.